Wednesday, 3 August 2011

Show me the money

So lets sum up the state of the world finances at the moment.
We're boned.

Greece is as good as bankrupt, shortly followed by the Republic of Ireland. The UK's debt is so huge they're having to invent new words to describe it. The USA isn't doing so well either. Japan at least has a reason for being strapped for cash, earthquakes are expensive messes to clean up.

Ireland owes billions to the UK. The UK owes billions to the USA and God only knows who they owe money to. Greece just owes money to everyone. So where exactly did all the worlds money go?

I have a few theories.
First is that several countries have been quietly printing extra bank notes to patch the financial hole. This of course would normally lead to the currency being slightly devalued, unless the government in question simply didn't tell anyone. Which is international monetary fraud.

Secondly it's possible that certain third world countries, who have been begging for aid for the last 30 something years, have simply been stockpiling wealth. This theory would mean that the starving millions in Africa are faking it.

Third on the list are celebrities. It's no secret that they are overpaid, but think about this. If Paul McCartney, Tom Cruise, Bill Gates etc gave up HALF their wealth then there would be no world debt. Paul McCartney would save the world and still be a billionaire.

The fourth theory is simple. Aliens did it.

Realistically speaking, the real reason is probably a combination of the first three, though never rule out aliens. EVER.

As the saying goes "Money makes the world go round", so maybe global finance will completely collapse and the world will indeed end in 2012. Who-ever's to blame, rich people, poor people, stupid people or fucking bankers, we can at least laugh at them when their billions are only good for toilet paper.

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